sexonatable's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GET ME OUT OF HERE So You must be warned! This entry is going to be extremely long because I am in a mood to write!! So lets begin: I have decided that I don't want to be here any longer. I totally hate Midland.... There are so many awesome memories here but those are in the past and the future in this town looks bleak. I have even thought about leaving now with Joe and then like shipping him back to Midland when schools over. But how terrible!!!! HAHAHA Thats so mean, but seriously how much longer can I deal with living in Midland I feel like I am losing my mind. I hate it here nothing is holding me here Nothing at all I want to go now!!!! Ugh... I don't know.. I just don't know... about anything really... my car died like permanatly died... and I either need to buy a new Tranny hahaha tranny means transvestite and transmission funny how I never noticed that before! ANYWAY I have to buy a transmission or get a new car... Sounds easy HUH NO!!! Its expensive and a major pain in the ass...uhhh....I don't know lately I have been depressed... Like I am feeling total disconnect from the city of Midland Michigan... it is so blah I am getting like moving anxiety... I have even thought about just moving to mt plesant which is like a half hour from here thats where my school is as well as CMU A major university so the housing is cheap... Because then atleast then I would not live in Midland right!!! No driving around looking for someone who shouldn't mean anything, no calling Jerry and saying I will be there shortly, and no dealing with annoying mom and Grandma when I don't want to.... Really I think I should look further into this... SOMETHING ANYTHING JUST GET ME OUT OF HERE... What is wrong with me I have never ever wanted to get out of here more! I just want to move away and start over... ugh...ITS SO WEIRD! Does everyone feel like this am I the only one that just begins to freak out and decide that she just cant take living in her city that she has lived in for almost 25 years any more. I have spent my entire life in this town I swore that I was going to die here and that I would live here forever and now I don't want to like I can't even stand driving around and like seeing Midland I just feel so bored so sick of this routine..... Okay I am sorry about my mindless rambling but seriously diary I think your the only one that is taking me seriously... When I say I want to move away it seems everyone is just like yea whatever..They really honestly just have no clue how badly I just don't want to be here....bahhhhhhhhh I think I am just freaking out... I need to go to bed or something good lord 1:40 a.m. - 2010-02-12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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