sexonatable's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What is this feeling? Well.. I know it's a long streach to say that I should break up with the man who I have been planning to marry. But hell.. there is life out there that I know about and I am a sex god. right... I still have not lost my touch I still know how to suck a cock and I know how to have some good sex.. Yet I am sitting here trying my best to be very faithful to one person.. Strange.. I know... stupid.. Probably.. I talked to the old fucker today. We have been not getting along and we have not seen each other alone where we could actually touch in days. This worries me considering I have decided to consume time by starting to plan my wedding and also by deciding that it is time to start planning. But I am not sure if it is going to work out between me and the all mighty old one. I love him I am trying to change for him. Have not cheated in like weeks.. No I have not cheated since long hair. Thats a while for me. I mean come on I am used to carrying up to 4 guys at a time and a boyfriend. *OH YA* I am good damnit. But no this is the one I decided to change for. Why I am not sure maybe cause I have fallen' in love strange as it may be I do have a heart I guess. That's what the doctors tell me. I don't know what to do with the new me. It's not right I feel wrong. I am starting to get sick and stuff I think it's lack of other penis. I don't know but I don't wanna leave the house I feel like shit I called in sick called in to anger management when I only have two left! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME! I just moap around and sleep and call the old man and stare at the phone waiting for a reply. I done think I have lost my mind batman! I have fallen into a state of depression. Just think of what it would be like if we broke up. Probably worse.. thats not good.. I would stop eating and stop everything. What the hell I do not understand what it is this man did to me but for some reason i am in love with him.. I want to marry him and spend whatever rest of a life he has with him by his side holding him and being the one who he loves and would never want to be with out. Okay... I am done rambling I think I am going to sleep until I have to call him that or I will just lie in bed and think of him.. GOD I'M SICK! 1:58 p.m. - 2005-04-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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